| Product | Best For | Title | Description | Link |
 |
Marriage Help | Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel | This is an alternative to marriage counseling that actually works! | Visit Site |
 |
Divorce Advice | Divorce Secrets | If you are going through a divorce or know for sure that's in your future, then this book is a must read. It will teach you all of the secrets you need to know about how to protect yourself, your family, and your finances. | Visit Site |
Divorce Threatened - Relationship Advice
Question:My husband has been threatening Divorce for months, and I finally am giving up, and I want out of the relationship also. Now that I have began divorce proceedings, he has been SUPER nice to me, buying me roses, saying that he does not want a divorce. This has happened before, and I took him back, then three days later we were at each-others' throats again. I will continue with the divorce, but I am curious if he is sincere that he wants to be with me, or if he is looking for "the chase". Any ideas?
Answer: You have 3 options.
Firstly, you could abort the divorce altogether and do nothing. This doesn't seem like a good option, because you will probably simply end up fairly soon, right where you are at now.
Secondly, you could proceed with the divorce and completely disregard your husband's "good intentions". This is a viable option. However, in the event that your husband's intentions are truly genuine, we at WDS recommend the third option.
The third option is to proceed with the divorce, or at least, the preliminary stages of the divorce, for example, you need to start assessing your joint assets, and consider the division of these assets, and so on. Depending on your jurisdiction, one-year separation may be grounds for divorce. In any event, it may be a good idea to physically separate while you are assessing your options.
During the time that you are physically apart, you may be able to view the situation with greater objectivity. The fact that your spouse threatened divorce and only becomes interested when "the chase is on" is definitely troublesome. As well, you mention that he threatened divorce in the past. Why does he change his mind when you initiate divorce? Does he want to be "the one", to control the situation?
You can try counselling and see where that leads you. If you do decide to give him an opportunity, give yourself and him concrete timelines and specific goals. Set a priority list for a healthy relationship and ascertain whether he wants to be a part of a stable, long-term relationship and also, whether he is capable of the same. If not, "open your door and chase him right out". Chasing is fun, when it's around the bed, but otherwise, it's simply tiring and best left to small children!!
We wish you all the best,
WDS Staff with input from M.C.
Bookmark/Search this post with:
It seems to me your husband
It seems to me your husband is playing games with you. He doesn't want to be married to you, but when faced with divorce he changes his mind. He sounds like a coward to me. Call his bluff and go through with it! You can do better!
in the process
hi
i am really confused and emotionally drained from a relationship that has been strained for the last nine months almost. the other day my husband filed for a divorce and he gave me the impression that he didnt really want it but since has turned bitter and angry.
Done with the process
My husband and I divorced 1 month ago and between our separation up until the divorce we were "dating". We thought divorce would be the right thing. I found some things out right after the divorce and told him to leave me alone. Two weeks later he's calling me again being all nice. I ended up going to a bar where he was at and sleeping with him again. My emotional roller coaster never ends when I do this. Now it seems he's back to I don't want committments. I decided it's time for me and I was strong before and I won't let him bring me down again. I too think it's the chase. I think they probably love us but once they get us back and have us in the palm of their hands they act the same way. It's time to MOVE ON.
Yes, he's in it for the chase
I have to say he is in it for the chase. Just like that, I can't have you but don't want anyone else to either? My ex husband did the same thing. First he wanted me, then he didn't. I caught him cheating and we went through the whole divorce. A few weeks after signing the papers he came over to visit our daughter, brought me flowers, and we talked for hours. We "gave it another try" and started "dating" and wouldn't you know it, a few weeks later it was back to the same.
Don't play his games. If he doesn't want you all the time, then he can't have you at all.
Pamela
http://divorce4her.com/
I have to agree
What a horrible game he is playing... I agree with the last comment, he sounds like he's having a bit of fun with this... Not good at all.
For some reason, I believe men do this for the "fun of it" and also because of low self esteem. Move on, get away from that, you deserve better....
On another note, I was quite surprised to see that site divorce4her, would you believe I used that site for my divorce? It was a great choice, made it so much easier on me, highly recommend it (if I'm allowed to!!!????)
Nic
Iam hurt confused and dont know what to do any more..
Well its a long story that started almost 10 years a go. I was married and had 1 child.I soon after I had her realized I no longer loved my husband and then before we where devoriced I ment the man that is now my husband.We fell in love right off the bat.And got married had a child and he has been dad to my 1st child ever since.But he cheeted on me and then came home and did this several times and then in this past year dident cheet on me but kissed my supposed best friend and proseeded to to fall in love with her and her with him.Now so much has happend and he left and came home and I did cheet on hin 1 time last year after he got addicted to a on line game called World of WarCraft and was not doing any thing with me or our kids.That was somthing I never wanted to do and I have been sorry ever since.I do love him and he say's he loves me but not like a husbend should because he can no longer trust me and there fore let me in to his hart any more than what it is and so now he wants a devorice and mind you he has done and siad this 2 or 3 times before and has always come home.I asked him what makes this time any diff. and he said he knew that we have to because now when he does somthing that hurts me he dosent care that it does as huch as it should.He loves me but not enought to be married to me any more..What should I think? I want to keep hope that we will be back to geather one day when he can get past it but he dosent think he ever will.No matter what..HELP!
How to get through the loneliness...
Heres my background story. My husband and I met on a blind date 12 years ago. We met two weeks after I had broke up with a guy that I had been seeing for 4 years. We entered a long distance relationship he lived 3 hours away and he began coming to see me every weekend. After about one year, we descided to get married. We have now been married for about 10 years. He has never been a great communicator & has always thought women should have their girl friends for this. He also has been a terrible financial provider. He has owned his own construction business but do to not having business sense has not made any money and basically I have been the support for 10 of the 12 years weve known each other. About 9 months ago, I was not feeling close to him anymore and basically frustrated with things, so didnt really feel like having sex too often, well he descided to join affairmatch.com, after me getting mad that he was bugging me for sex daily and I didnt want it. I havent been able to orgasm with him for 2 years. Anyway, I dont think he ever followed through with meeting anyone, but it really hurt me. About three months later after that, I was contacted by an old flame who I use to be madly in love with, we had great conversation, but he is an upstanding guy who would not interfere with someones marriage, so I lied and told him we were seperating. I told my husband it was over, and he threatned to kill himself, so I told him that we could go to counseling. Well I proceeded to talk to my long lost love and ended up meeting him and we really hit it off. Well anyway the husband called me when he was there and asked if I was there with someone, I said I didnt want to talk about it...so of course he assumed that I was with the guy. I spent four days with my old flame, he didnt try to have sex with me, although we slept in same hotel, he said that this wasnt about sex for him, he wanted to develop something. Anyways... when i got home, I told husband I didnt want to work on things. When I was sleeping he got my phone and called the new guy and told him a bunch of things about me, untrue etc... then he got off the phone came and woke me up, very pissed, he was almost choking me.. never has shown any sort of violence ever... he then kept saying how could I do this to him, over and over... he proceeded to go in the closet and put a loaded gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger, but it didnt fire....He has since calmed down and we are staying friendly due to having a couple kids. I have told him I am not in love with him. I want it to be over. Now the sad thing is, the old flame has became distant, and I cant blame him....But now I am grieving over the loss of a marriage and a first love.... How do I move past this...???
what do i do in the beginning
i am alone...when does this do away
Not daylong ago, I
Not daylong ago, I publicised an article most sextet qualities to esteem in others, and the salutation was extraordinary. I prefaced the article by locution that the sextet I mentioned were by farther not an complete list, pass4sure 70-291 but included those traits that seemed especially hornlike to find. In datum every of the comments, however, I was inspired to indite a follow-up itemize that covers several of the another qualities that I, as well as others, conceive to be significant when hunting for friendships and relationships with others. Our relationships are alive to our noetic well-being. However, cyanogenic relationships be able to rattling do a sort on our enjoyment and looking on life. pass4sure 70-270 As a result, it is significant to countenance for individuals who possess qualities that earmark for flourishing relationships. Although, erst again, not an complete list, the qualities traded beneath are those that should be at the specially hunch of a flourishing relationship. And, pass4sure 70-649 meet as you would wait your friend, kinsfolk member or idolized one to pass these qualities, it is meet as significant to reciprocate.